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#13 – Conclusion and outlook

I honestly started this blog series without a goal or idea of results and was overwhelmed by the overall theme every now and then along the way. Because there are so many similarities and at least as many differences. When I look at everything in the overall concept, toxic behaviors really are the order of the day. Not only can you encounter them everywhere, but they also challenge you accordingly. Mindfulness really does seem to be the order of the day here.

Initially, I had assumed that such behavior was more likely to be found in higher positions where power and influence, success and money are the main drivers. But toxic behaviors know no target groups, gender, status, boundaries or preferences. What struck me again, however, is the fact that toxic behavior can also be divided into female and male forms, but here too it is less gender-specific and more related to the respective qualities. So please read posts # 11 and 12 with this in mind and don't be so focused on men and women.

The essence is rather that the underlying injuries must all have occurred in childhood. Later manifestations are merely a modification or adaptation to current circumstances and can intensify or diminish accordingly. So here, too, it is about the triggers that trigger the corresponding reactions in a state of a dysregulated nervous system. These reactions have developed unhealthily and excessively in the context of toxic behaviors. However, the mechanisms involved are the same. The backgrounds are usually quite similar, but the motives ultimately differ greatly depending on the situation, gender and culture.

Toxic behaviors should not be underestimated, suppressed or minimized in any way. On the contrary, they must be taken very seriously because the consequences and repercussions can be so far-reaching and profound. It is important to recognize that addressing toxic behavior is a complex and ongoing process that requires the collaboration of various actors, including individuals, communities, organizations and governments.

Overall, it remains and is important to understand the constellation in which one relates to the person with toxic behaviors in order to feel a little more confident about what responses are possible and appropriate. The aim should be to introduce healthy and supportive changes and countermeasures. Socially, we need more transparency, openness and a willingness to engage in conflict in order to be able to deal with each other in a more trusting, secure and protected manner in the future. Knowing that there is always someone on hand to listen to and see you in situations that seem or are perceived as strange, in the event of interpersonal aberrations, perfidious and derogatory behavior, would certainly be a good basis for putting a preventative stop to this form of behavior. On the one hand, it would be clear that toxic behavior does not go undetected, let alone unpunished, and on the other, it would be certain that it is no longer tolerated.

Ultimately, this leads to the introduction and stabilization of a safe environment in the company, the respective department or the respective team. This is the responsibility of the company management, the team management and ultimately the team itself and is more about a certain inner attitude.

The safe environment offers and establishes an atmosphere in which everything and everyone is allowed to be authentic, unconditional and unconditional. Only in such an environment is it possible for everyone to openly contribute their ideas, wishes, needs, experiences and individual personality. Without fear of rejection, degradation, exclusion, shame or guilt. The necessary and previously coordinated and agreed rules and conditions for such an environment are to be treated like a law and may not be disregarded under any circumstances. If an agreement is violated, it is important to clarify and analyze the violation together and transparently in the spirit of good conflict management and to recognize the gift in the violation in order to improve and adapt the rules. We are all learning, constantly and everywhere. Each of us, individually and together, in every situation.

In an environment where everyone is making similar developments and progress, you feel safe, are willing to open up even more and recognize the team spirit and that the shared energy enables everyone to reach new heights. This not only welds you together, but also empowers you with even more self-confidence, courage, creativity and well-being. It's like an upward spiral.

Toxic behaviors are immediately noticeable in this environment and can be directly addressed and treated to get back to a healthier work environment.


The risk of backbiting is certainly there, as with other destructive behavior, but it is negligible compared to the transparency that is created.

So trust yourself and others when something seems strange, be mindful, analyze carefully and see what options for action are available to you as soon as toxic behaviors appear in your environment.


Coaching offers ideal support here to either take the first steps in conflict management and analysing one's own reaction structures or to directly implement new skills that enable and empower all those involved to learn to deal well and confidently with corresponding situations in relationships. Another option is to act as a mediator or observer and outline a neutral picture of the prevailing relationship patterns in the department or company and use this to provide insights and recommendations for action to the decision-makers.

Trusting that the best possible solution will be allowed to develop and be implemented.


Coaching can provide you with targeted support in overcoming upcoming challenges at every stage - internally in the team or as a leader in the company. Let's work out together how I can provide you in your individual situation with optimal support and customised assistance.

Contact me to take your next steps

Nicole Dildei Coaching

+49 157 58 267 427

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